510: Conclusions made...

So I'm reading this book that my day-job boss gave me, called Emotional Intelligence 2.0, and it is out there to really get you into the understanding that while being a genius can help you with the realization of potential, it's those that figure out how to apply that to everyday thinking that creates success. It is an interesting source material and I wonder how I should apply it to my everyday thinking. Obviously, I just started reading the thing, so I assume that I still need to read the whole thing to grasp it, and not even in its entirety.

Some conclusions about what's going on with me have been made. Some BY me, some apparently for me without equivocation. We all saw that I started writing about someone and began enjoying FEELING something again. Well, it all stopped, suddenly, and without my knowledge, it seems. This seemed to be going well, and she had a tragedy strike. Pardon me if I've written this much into the blog to date, but since then, we had two times that we were chatting and now, a full seven days later, there is NO COMMUNICATION back towards me from her.

I understand that people grieve differently, and I've apologized for telling her how I would have tried to handle the tragedy now, after having lived through a couple from people that were close to me...I understand that this was something I shouldn't have done without first being asked for said opinion, and that's why I apologized. I knew that while what I was saying may not have been wrong, it was not my place to say what I would do, something in my work field and typically in my life field, I have to do on the regular...so I apologized, and still, nothing. I tend to believe this means one of two things...

1) Leave her alone so she can continue to grieve on her own time and at some point, if there was anything, it will begin again if I haven't moved towards something else...

2) She decided that she wants nothing to do with a 33 yr old male who likes her and is worried about her after the tragedy and she wants to get through it with just those closest to her, since things were just starting between us.

I don't know which one is the answer, but I know my rebuttal...I'm going to continue to live my life. If she shows up and I'm somewhere, I'll deal with it...handle it...or do what I always do, and not make a scene and just be me and go on like nothing happened. Who knows, I really don't know what I'd do, except that I'm going to continue to do the things I do, because I shouldn't put my life aside while I wait for someone to figure out that I'm an awesome person to be around and wants to know what's going on with them...

Yes, that was the arrogance coming out that everyone knows I exude. Call it my charm, call it my humor...but make sure, you call it me. And I'm not going to stop being the guy I am now because I actually like me.

Success in everything...and nothing...all at the same time.